Tough love is heartbreaking. I am angry. I am sad. I am drinking my tea while my baby is finally napping. The last couple of days she has not wanted to go down for her morning nap. Back track, Madelyn was consistently going down after being awake for 2 hours. Usually very easily. Last couple of days not so much. Crying, not wanting to go down. So today I thought, fine. I'll let you stay up longer and see if that makes it easier. Nope. Same battle. Day 3. She would fall asleep in my arms only to wake when I laid her down, then comes the screaming. After the second fall asleep in my arms into the crib attempt. I walked out of her room. I came downstairs started the kettle. I could hear her screaming but this time I was giving her 8 minutes. If she was still screaming in 8 minutes I would go to her. As the kettled boiled and I filled my cup, the anger inside of me was building with every tormented scream coming from the monitor. The minutes felt like hours. This started at 9:52am so she had until 10:00am and I was going to go rescue her. By 9:55am there was a big sigh and by 9:57am I heard nothing. She had cried herself to sleep. Ugh. I could cry typing that sentence. I feel awful. I've felt the need to blog about it. Other friends of mine have done the same technique and I have always encouraged them and told them they were doing a great job. Why don't I feel the same way about myself? There's that Mommy Self-Doubt. Always wondering, guess it never goes away even when I start think I am doing a great job -- it finds a way to creep back into my mind.